So a little over a month ago I had minor surgery and spent two nights in the hospital. Before my surgery, I explained the best that I could to my kids that I was not sick. I did not have cancer like their grandmother did and I wasn't going to be in and out of the hospital. This was one stop shopping - one surgery, I'd recover, and there'd be no reason why I should have to go back to the hospital again. (Again, I've stopped short of any promises - we all know there's always a small chance something could go wrong and I never want my kids to have a reason to not trust my promises, no matter how well intentioned they may be.)
Luckily, my dad was able to stay at my house with my kids while the surgery was happening so my husband could be at the hospital with me and my kids could get that extra love from a family member, especially one they know & love so much. It made it so much easier for me to just deal with my surgery, but I spent so much time thinking about how to explain this to my kids (and my sister's), I didn't even think that any of us adults would be that affected by my surgery.
I think all of us had that little fear of what if I was among that small percentage of patients that don't wake up from the anesthesia? (Obviously, I did - I'm here typing this blog entry.) But I didn't really think anyone besides me thought about it til my sister told me she had got a bit emotional once she heard I was OK and I realized that my husband had been nervous, too. There are just more realizations about mortality and how things can go wrong when you've lost a loved one to cancer. Life really doesn't give promises, and even with safe, non-life threatening situations, sometimes something still goes wrong. And since it hasn't even been a year since my mom has passed, I think we're all a bit extra sensitive to the fragility of life.
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